Holidays in NUS

Dear Weixiong

I regret to inform you that you have not met the deadline of 2nd jan 2006 to meet to apply for SEP in YR2 Sem 2 and hence your application is rejected.

Oh well, this seems so real. I remembered having a talk with Debbie and Jan quite some time ago, they as my seniors (just becos they dun serve NS) tell me to treasure the holidays I have in NUS, do all the things you always wanted to do, travel to exotic countries cos one will prob not have the bones and to say climb mountains or go try out bungee jumping anymore (Until now I haven convinced myself that I have the guts to do it)

And that conversation with them sorta triggered my mind to think of how to utilize my 4 yrs worth of hols in NUS( that is if i made it to honours then). So this is what i came out with (in the midst of exam period...)tentatively.

Dec 05: Nothing much planned intially but then am glad I went for the FeiYue volunteer camp. Was indeed quite an experience handling those youths. Will also be heading to Bangkok in January (presents anyone?)

Jun 06: Will most prob take part in Project Angel(an overseas mission trip). Being able to witness the poverty in the country will make me better appreciate the life I have in Sing. (Also be involved in the National JCs economics quiz)

Dec 06: A one week seminar with MOE. Wish to climb Mt. Kinabalu and go snorkelling/ whitewater rafting

Jun 07: Hopefully back from SEP. Deadline to apply is less than 2 weeks time and I still do not know which country to go to. First choice is Europe cos I have been to the States B4. UK universities are limited while English speaking courses in other Unis in Europe are limited too. A 3 week attachment in schools in July.

Dec07:nothing planned yet.

Jun08: It's being a volunteer at Beijing 08 or Work/Travel USA. Guess the latter seems more likely.


Gosh! That seems a lot to accomplish, but then wat's above will serve as a guide so that I dun waste these golden years away ya. BAck to research for SEP universities, and also pray for results on 23rd Dec.

To Love and to be loved

To Love and to be loved

It's been a long time since i got emotionally attached to a girl. She is indeed special to me in many ways:

It's been a long time since someone can knock so much sense into me. She made me realise that I was living in my own comfort zone all this while, not daring to venture out to look for greener pasteurs. Always uncomfortable to provide a listening ear for fear that the problem will become my own, that it will become exemplified when I use my heart to listen and empathize. I have not gone through the extremeties of emotions which may have led to the large inertia I have to leave this comfort zone. I think I need to feel more with my heart, see more with my eyes and listen with my ears. Please do no hide or mitigate your feelings anymore.

It's been a long time since someone cooked for me. And I think it's the first time someone cooked specially for me. For a moment, I thought I was the most fortunate man on Earth.

To this special girl in my life: together we shall grow to become better persons through this relationship, shed our bad habits and be a blessing to the people around us, may the Lord be our guide. Thank you for stepping into my life and teaching me how to love again.

Midst of exams

Midst of Exams

A very rare post, came across this flash animation, it's quite cool.Do visit this link.My MSN nick now is -伟雄-惨遭考试的蹂躏，被杀得偏体鳞伤！Enough said, haven felt so lousy in a long long time.

End of Mid-term Break

End of Mid-term break

This mid-term break has indeed come timely, finally a chance to slow down the pace of things going on around me, the chance for me to re-evaluate the direction in which I am heading in this point in time, or simply the chance to breathe freely once again. Gone were the days in army that were carefree, just head to camp, hang out and talk crap with close buds, awaiting for 1730 hrs everyday seemed to be some sort of motivation everyday. It is indeed an irony that many of us, as an NSF grumble and complain about the lack of freedom we have then, and now reminiscing about the life we had in army Or perhaps I am the only one?

It's definitely crunch time for many of us in NUS, 4 mid-term tests and an essay of 1500 words due next week. However, despite the 'supposedly hectic' timetable I have drawn out for myself, I managed to squeeze time to catch two movies! Namely Eric Khoo's 'Be With Me' and Jackie Chan's 'The myth'.(Yes, i was at the premiere, all thanks to Eugene). I am not that good with movie reviews but shall just add my personal touch to it since you do not need to visit this site if you want to know what the movies are about.

'Be with me' is quite an arty-farty film I should say, if you have not already known, it's a local production rated M18. The only thing I heard prior to watching is that this movie is that there consist of 3 stories interwoven together and one of them depicts the love of 2 lesbians. That was probably one of the untold reasons why my KR OG(and yes, I went for the outing) decided to watch the show? This show had less than 40 dialogues between all the characters of the story added up. The director was effective in using different techniques from the characters' SMSing, a third person narrating typing away on the old fashioned type writer, to deliver the story. There were occasional yawns from the audience throughout the 1 hr 40 min show but strangely enough, no one from the group fell asleep. It was only after the show which we discussed about that some of them actually shed some light pertaining certain issues that were highlighted in the show. I will give it an overall rating of 6 stars out of 10? If you still do not understand what I am trying to say here, do visit this website


The typical Jackie Chan movie, with his signature showcase of dare-devil stunts and exciting fighting scenes, Jackie will play dual roles - one as 3rd century Qin Dynasty general and a modern archaeologist in "The Myth". The story line seemed pretty logical to me at first but as the story slowly unfolded, the last part was totally absurd as you see Jackie Chan and Korean star Kim Hee-sun performing anti-gravity flying stunts(as if they have qing gong or somthing)among numerous ancient Qin warriors floating in mid-air due to some ancient metorite stone in the vicinity. One thing I must mention is the sheer beauty of Kim Hee-sun. Am not a fan of Korean drama but guess she will be my idol of the month or something. Overall rating: 6.5 stars out of 10, I rememebered Jackie Chan's previous show "New Police Story" appealed to me more

Gosh, I spent about 40 mins typing this entry in the central library instead of trying to complete my essay and tutorials. Anyway, just for laughs, I have decided to upload one of my Taiwan photos below, have a great weekend ahead!


Help! Falling Rocks!

Mugging time

Mugging time

I realised there really isn't this bit of sports genes in me, acting and singing aint my fortre too. Sometimes I look up in the sky, wondering what I am good at?

It's just one of my crappy mood, once again, I will be alright, perhaps the question of self-worth will keep popping up once in a while. Thanks all for being there. It's time to mug soon...

Friday is my free day

I shall declare that Friday is my free day! Realised that my "Understanding the Universe" lecture is an utter waste of time, and this has been verified by Waty, my JC classmate and senior in NUS who has kindly offered to give me her notes for this module.

And, so this morning joined Meng, Vin and Gene for KTV @ Suntec City and goSh! Eugene managed to sing quite a number of mandarin songs and he sang pretty well too with his 'Unchained Melody' vocals. We are so gonna miss him when he goes to Imperial on 1st Oct. I feel he's the most steadfast fren among the group, always dependable, just a phonecall away. Always the provides the most logical advice among the six of us. That's goona leave only Nest, me, Meng and Vin in Singapore.

I went for tuition this afternoon at Wo Lui's house. I think I am getting a bit impatient with Jon, hm, to me sometimes he does not seem to pay attention to what i am saying. But from another perspective perhaps, what I am saying he may have heard it upteen times. He seems to have too much tuition outside excluding mine so pple have been nagging at him for the same reasons. He is improving, I can feel it, but then it;s not fast enough. Perhaps my teaching methods aint right, I rem my previous tuition kid's brother I was teaching, he dint seem to improve much too. But hey my sec4 kids did well for their prelims! from 36 pts to 72 pts over 100, thanks to their wonderful tutor!

Dinner was at Asia Pacific breweries. Thanks to Andrea's friend who won a lucky draw, a group of four of us, plus the whole big group of peeps from NTU hall 7. Met some familiar faces and Sam loy was one of them. There was free flow of food and of course beer which included Tiger, HeineKen, Erdinger, Barons etc. Played games like INdian poker, a pathetic game of pool which we lost and had to drink as a result. Pretty much uneventful but still a place with nice ambience, great beer?

Back to KR, and my block, prob to celebrate ourselves being the Champions of IBG, decide to have a drinking session so I just brought the vodka which i have brought form home up. I dun dare to drink much cos the beer earlier, but then the rest were drinking away with whiskey, Baileys and others unidentified. I was rather surprised when I realised some of my female seniors actually smoke. Well perhaps they are just social smokers, I rem previously I was also offered a cigarette over at Jensen's birthday party, glad I dint accept it. Just in awe to know so many of the people around me actually smoke.

Help! I got an 1500word history essay due in two weeks time, but guess wat, I am actually looking forward to doing it, though time consuming, i believe it will bring tremendous satisfaction. OK, not making sense already from all that alcohol, got my 2nd French lesson later in the afternoon. Au revoir.

Yeah, I know my posts have been sparse. Too many things have happened recently and often I thought i have something significant to update, something else has already happened. Thanks for the comments for my previous posts from anonymous, realli appreciate them, will definitely bear that in mind.

Carmen actually messaged me a Happy TEacher's day MMS, which includes one of the my pictures playing the suona in sec 4? Well, it goes something like this: "ohmygod, u lool fat, thanks for all the guidanceand help u've given me.." oh Well, i was not born thin, perhaps the PE and RT training back in Vj helped. Will need to maintain a certain level of fitness for IPPT, which brings me to the point that i ran for road race for KR today. It wasnt a superb run, the central library slope nearly killed me, but then my block won overall champions anyway. One of the guys clocked 7 mins * sec for 2.2km, breaking the KR record. Next was volleyball training for the match today which we won and which i played less than 30 mins, well they had better seniors around to play. But dint realli had the experience to play in a competitive Vball match b4 and the atmosphere was indeed tense.

For hall life, currently has taken part in Frisbee, Vball, road race. Colin/ Yuwei actually commented that they saw me around twice in two weeks which probably qualifies me as a phantom of KR. But oh well, guess that does not bother me anymore. Came to terms that I will only do things that I enjoy doing in hall,wont do dumb/ useless things just to get the points required to stay in hall next yr. Dint make the cut for hall acapella, wont dare to say I have the sports genes to make it for inter hall games next sem, prob will have to join some committees to stay on, shall see how? Besides hall stuff, currently i am a member of the NUSSU Bizcom where we organise, market and get sponsors for NUSSU events. Good chance for me to learn something new like marketing which i dun realli have the chance of doing in NUS. Weining also requested that I be part of the committee for the 2006 inter JC economics quiz, which automatically qualifies me as a Econs Soc member. Yah, I know that Ishould be more involved in hall rather then outside activitiis, but then seems like the projects that KR is doing now more or less involve in KR bash and the hall production.

Enough of coms, I sometimes think to myself that I shud realli try to pick up a sport or smth, to keep fit and learn a new skill. Also considering some volunteering organisations like NVAC or the rotaracts who be heading to Cambodia next year. I believe going on such mission trips will shed a different light on me, making me appreciate the many things i have taken for granted. Tennis, karate or VBall( For IHG) are prob games that I might consider?

Some good news:MOE increased my scholarship allowance according to PSC guidelines! Hm, came at a right time , we'll get more subsidy and Laptop allowance. Hm, and finally announcing that i can use the extra money to pay for my french classes, which is supposedly to start this Sat! Kinda excited and hopefully when i Go for exchange: UK ( Imperial College) or University of California Berkeley, then my French will be put to good use if I were to tour Europe two yrs later.

Work has been piling up recently, Being a chem majorAm still coping ok with my chem modules though lab work absolutely aint my cup of tea, being a chem major but then my Linear Algebra is really killing me, someone even teared during the tutorial when she dint understand a thing. I thought I was in the same plight as her.

Still trying to strike the balance betw my family, social life and hall life. This equilibrium, if not kept in check, will prob bring many regrets and remorses in the future.It really is high time to consider what I realli want from my 4 yrs of undergrad studies here in NUS( ranked 18th in the world)(yeah right?!)
Hope everyone is doing well now, those busy with Exams, coping in hall life, struggling in army, aint coping well studies, remember, i am just a phone call away.

Thoughts from KR

Thoughts from KR

Finally, my first entry from my own room in campus (Kent Ridge Hall)> I actually moved in on 25th July, the day which orientation started, and finally today marks the final day of Orientation, which is also the annual NUS Rag day where all halls and faculties compete with one another with their completed floats.

I wont dare to say I have been very active in hall, maybe i attended about 50 percent of the activites, also kanna labelled by some of the seniors as buay on, but then I have my own reasons for not attending. Tuition on Wed, matric fair, TSPC ..

Activities that I may/ want/ have to be involved in:

1) Jonathan Lui (Wo Lui's only son) tuition twice a week on wed 8-10 pm, sunday 2-4 pm. He is primary 5 this year and apparently he is quite weak in his foundations for eng/ maths / science. I have this onus to make him improve and at least he is showing some glimpse of light. However, i need to travel to Woodlands which is like damn far from campus, so travelling time needs to be considered.

2) Sec4 n level maths-Once a week, date always not confirmed. I have been wih this group for about 2 mths, Hafiz, Ivan and Khaimun will be taking their N levels this coming Oct so intensive training needs to be given. They are slowly becoming more proficient and I am quite comfortable teaching them.

3) Sec 3 A maths- Every Sunday This is a new kid which Simon gave to me, who stays near Simon (Peiyi's uncle). My first lesson with him will be this Sunday and i guess i may need to polish my maths b4 going to teach him.

4) French Lessons @ Alliance Francaise- Should be signing up for French lessons this coming saturday with Alex and probably Janice? 244 Dollars and every lesson gonna be 3 hrs for 8 weeks, shud be Saturday 9am-12pm.

5) Hall Activities: Still unsure but i am looking at Inspire ( some original song writing society in KR). I dunoe how i can contribute also, and i have no background in composing, and my singing also cannot make it. Hm, hoping to learn the guitar and maybe dizi, brush up on singing? Also looking at Inter block games like Volleyball or Frisbee which I prob can play and represent the block? Well, if i intend to stay in hall for one more yr, guess I prolly have to join other ad-hoc committees..

6) University Level CCAs- Currently looking at NUSSU Biz Com, they are the marketing arm for all NUSSU activities. Role includes to market the various events organized by student club and societies to commerical and external parties, thereby garnering sponsorship for such events. And supposedly by doing that will increase the portfolio of each of our members, to improve upon their networking and business contacts

7) Edu-tours- This has somewhat come to a stand still and guess its time for Daemon, Alex and I to sit down once again to get our priorities right

8_ Acadamic Stuff- Taking 5 Mods this sem, namely Inorganic Chem, Principles Of Modern Chem, Linear Algebra 1, Understanding the Universe and Evolution of a Global City State. Yup I know it doesn;t sound exactly interesting but who asks me to be a Chemistry major. Well, studies are also impt, and my brain is probably very rusty right now, and things like integration by parts sound so alien to me...

I havent really had time for myself to sit down to think about things and my mind seems to be whirling. I guess I have to get my priorities right before sch term starts which happens next week. Well, somehow I know that i am not alone, many people are facing the same kind of dilemma as me, I need enlightenment. It's time to meditate... but not when I be helping out later at 3am for our KR Float... Gosh, wont be sleeping tonight

Accurate?

Your Birthdate: March 2

Your birth on the 2nd day of the month adds a degree of emotion, sensitivity, and intuition to your life. The 2 is a very social number allowing you to make friends easily and quickly. Yet you are apt to have a rather nervous air in the company of a large group. You have a warmhearted nature and emotional understanding that constantly seeks affection. You are more prone than most to become depressed and moody, as emotions can turn inward and cause anxiety and mental turmoil. It can be hard for you to bounce back to reality when depression sets in.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Sorry to disappoint

Sorry to disappoint

Sorry, I am not posting pictures of my Taiwan trip, nor talking about OBS camp. I am just back from the first week to hall orientation, I got Kent Ridge Hall after a few grueling days of appeal. I have this sudden thought that perhaps it was a wrong decision after all. Sorry Alex, else we may be stayin in the same hall now. Still tryng to come to terms with many things in my life right now, mind is kinda spinning, not been sleeping enough,my mind is spinning with many questions and hopefully I will have answers for them by the end of next week...

Taiwan in less than 24 hrs

Taiwan in less than 24 hrs

Hey guys, I be in Taiwan in less than 24 hrs time, kinda excited about the whole trip. Be a refreshing break for me b4 my supposedly hectic study life?? Still doing some last min. packing now. Hm, I gonna thank XinJuan for her deuter bag, else I wont have a bag suitable for this trip.

K, this trip was initially conceived back in sec 2, when the six of us (Meng, Geno, Nest, Vin, Drew and Me) decided to visit Drew at his Taiwan hometown when we had the time and money. Fast forward to 7 yrs later, only I will be joining Drew for this Taiwan trip. Nest is not joining us cos he's going Cambodia, Meng got his driving test to pass, Vin has been to taiwan recently, and Geno is not going simply cos the rest is not going. So the pple going include Junlong, Chio, Tze Jin, Kim Seng , Drew and me. Quite a weird combi I shud think.

Hm, I should be visiting some cyber cafe to check mails, etc waiting for the hostel results from NUS. So anyone with last min. requests that they want me to get from Taiwan can prob leave some comments or tag and hopefully I see it, I will try my very best to get what you want. For those who already have requests, you can consider tagging to remind me. I have a poor memory ya (Guess wat! I dun even know my flight number tomorrow). Shall be back on the 13th (which happens to my sis's birthday), take care peeps!

Question of the day:
1) Anyone know which is the chinese pop group that sang 蔡依林's 天空？

To My Dad

To My Dad

Starting to see the light of things..

It is your birthday today and I have not even spoken to you for the entire day and with 3omins left,i seriously doubt I will have the chance to talk to you on your 50th birthday. It was supposed to be a birthday lunch celebration at Paris Restaurant @ Marina Square but you had to be at a polyclinic for your medical check up. You could have joined us if you woke up early and went for the checkup early.

Now, I could have accompanied you to go to the check up? Never in my 21 yrs of life have I accompanied you for any med check up. I do not remember what was the last present I gave you during father's day, just because your birthday is so near this day on the calendar.

My Dad and I didn't have much to talk about. He was not the kind to ask how your day was as a child, not the kind who played with me or bought me toys. He will just sit in the corner of the living room smoking his Camel, oblivious of the harmful effects of second-hand smoke to the people around him. The kind of father that occasionally brings home the bread, the many yrs of hard work have indeed taken its toil on him exemplified by his balding head and loosening pants.

He will not have another 50 yrs to live and this thought kind of scares me. Perhaps its due time that I change my attitude towards him, not saying I totally disregarded him but to really show my sincerest care and concern. This may sound cliche but I guess action will speak louder than words. To Pa, Happy Fiftieth Birthday!

Contemplating...

Contemplating

Still contemplating over certain issues for my university. Got to decide by 30th June which essentially means that I have slightly more than 1 week to make the decision. Here goes:

1) Language Preparation Programme for Student Exchange Programme (SEP). Yes! I want to go France for my SEP, i wont dare to say I know many things about the country but there is definitely something about the language and the culture that attracts me. Experience the Parisian's way of life in those cafes, the Eiffel Tower glistening in the distance. Hey, I also be able to visit neighbouring countries, UK to visit Eugene (time to do a who's who page, so that people will know whom I refer to in my rantings), Barcelona, London, Milan, Rome, Vienna, Stockholm, Zurich are all cities that I really want to visit.I even wish Paris will be able to win the Olympic 2012 bid. So if i am to be involved in this programme, i will need to take 4 french modules and I will be able to speak basic French for my exchange.
However, language modules in NUS are heavy and often time-consuming, it's goona take a lot of effort on my part to try to master the lang in a short span of 4 sems. Think how long you have taken to write and speak English fluently. I also cannot allow these modules to pull down my cap score which I will need to maintain at a certain level. Taking French classes outside @ Alliance Francaise is an alternative but of course it will be a financial liability. Sigh, still contemplating... Meanwhile, any khakis?

2) Yet to apply for my Hostel in NUS. Waiting for Alex to see whether he'll be able to switch to NUS in the first place then there will be the possibilty of bunking together. Double room rates will be more affordable, but only thing is that Kent Ridge does not have double rooms and there has been an agreement with Yuwei, Mingfeng, Ah Chio to stay @ Kent Ridge. I wont be able to choose my room mate @ NUS too, unless we pull string which will be possible at Eusoff since my cousin is there and she offered to help. No doubt there will be inconveniences with a roomate around, but both of us should be quite accomodable to each other's habits. So now, the decision lies: Kent Ridge Hall Vs Eusoff Hall?

Will be going to HSA (Health Science Authority) to donate blood along with Calvin tmr. Hey I have been a regular blood donor since JC2 and i hereby urge all people who fit the criteria ( must be at least 16, no illnesses, no unsafe sex blah blah) to go try donting blood. It's a good deed afterall and you get to save three lives as your blood gets separated into three portions. For more info on how you can save lives and be a blood donor, pls visit HSA website.

会有那么一天

会有那么一天

一九四三 世界大战 阿嬷年轻的时候
爷爷爱他那么多 他们感情很深 但是爷爷
身负重任 就在离乡的那夜给了阿嬷一个吻
轻声说到 我要离去 别再哭泣 不要伤心
请你相信我 要等待 我的爱 陪你永不离开
因为会有那么一天 我们牵着手在草原
听鸟儿歌唱的声音 听我说声 我爱你
夕阳西下 鸟儿回家 阿嬷躺 在病床上
呼吸有一点散漫 眼神却很温柔 看着爷爷
湿透的眼 握着他粗糙的手 阿嬷的泪水开始流 轻声说道

Farms visiting in Singapore

Farm Visiting

Oh ya! Thats wat the three of us ( Me, Alex and Daemon) did on a Saturday morning. We set off from Bukit Panjang interchange and our first destination was Hay Dairies farm. This is the only goats' farm we have in Singapore and is located at Lim Chu Kang (very ulu part of Northwestern Singapore). Went through the guided tour, saw first hand the milking of the goats but too bad we dint have the hands-on experience. Dun think dirty, i mean it'll be interesting to milk a goat ya?


Milking of Goats


That's what i call a goatee

Next interesting stop was at a frog's farm, but that was after about 1.5 hours of walking under the scorching heat. When we wanted to pop by a farm, there were dogs guarding it, and they even chased us until we are like at least 50 metres away from the farm! We were in fact quite loss in that area until we see this frog farm in the distance. It happens to be the largest frog leg suppiler in Singapore and we really see plenty of tadpoles and frogs there, of course with their distinctive croaks.
What was interesting is that they actually have like separate portions for the mating frogs so i managed to take this picture.


Three frogs trying to mate...

Ok, just some of the highlights of the farm visits.Yup, got pretty interested in agriculture in Singapore after my teaching stint. Interesting fact is that agriculture in Singapore takes up less than 1 percent of GDP, and that the land used for agriculture may eventually have to give way to commercial and industrial activities which are believed to be more viable, more beneficial to Singapore's economy. So you may ask, what the heck are three guys visiting all these farms on a Saturday? Well, a business plan is conceived and slowly brewing...

Well-Deserved Break!

Well-Deserved Break!

Still kinda enjoying my break till now. Days when I do not have to set my alarm clocks at unheavenly time of 0530hrs to be punctual for work. When was the last time I had such a break? I remembered back in 2002, I only had exactly one month of hols after my last A level paper. Enlisted on 271202 and I actually served 4yrs of NS (2002-2005). Ha! After that it was At IE Singapore and then relief teaching. I guess this will be a well-deserved break to rest my body and soul. This period of time will be a great opportunity for me to meet up with friends I lost contact with, reflect on my 21st yrs of life or just simply laze around, watching the world pass by. This can be a luxury too!

However, somehow , my finances seem to be rather tight, obviously for the reason that I am unemployed now and probably saving up for my trip to Taiwan. Yes! The dates have been confirmed 6/7-13/7 and am rather excited to actually sit down with the rest to plan the itinery. So, I am actually still on a lookout for temp jobs( those one week assignments or few days road shows kind) to tide over this mini crisis I have. Quite a paradox over here.

Oh ya, and i do appreciate people to leave their footprints behind after they have read, be it in the tagbox or comments, so that I know that you are reading this. Somehow i feel more motovated to write more entries? K , that's all for now, people who are also leading the same kind of life as me can drop me a message or call to meet up. I am free...

Something that makes me smile! 

Relief Teaching Stint

Relief Teaching

Three weeks of relief teaching- An overall great learning experience! On the first day, filled with trepidation and excitement as I stepped into the grounds of Dunman, I was greeted with the familiar scene- students donned in white tops with the distinctive metal buttons with blue bottoms. Being the traditional Chinese Medium Sch- they spoke the pledge in Mandarin- which I hardly can remember! Some highlights:

Most humiliating thing that happened- I stepped into the wrong classroom for my first lesson! Well, its not my fault as there was a switch in classrooms betw 1E and 2E since there was a student who sprained his leg. Well I was quite embarassed by the whole situation that I dint really looked at the expressions of the people.

Most helpful teachers- Well many of them qualify, includes Ms Tang, Ms Pear and Mrs Bok. Without them and their valuable resources, I will not be able to deliver my Geo lessons seamlessly. Consider what the sec 3 Geo Elective students actually go very much into detail on human topics like agriculture( I really thought they could be farmers next time, seriously). Special mention to Ms Ling, again who got me this relief teaching job.

Most 'Helpful' Friends- Ernest and Calvin who popped by my geo lesson, standing outside the classroom, distracting and signalling me to give the students a smoking break~ as if they are in the army.

Most quotable quotes from former teachers-
MR Kiw ," 喔， 长得一表人才"
Mrs Shu, " You finished NS? Doesn't seem like..."

Other relief teachers-
Senny who came for one day and concluding that teaching is definitely for her.
Tsz Shan who came for two days teaching bicultural studies

Greatest Fear- Stepping into my English class, and delivering a lesson on punctuation that lasted two periods. According to the lesson plan, i was supposed ot teach "The effective use of commas in essay writing" and "Use of punctuation marks to enhance writing". For a moment, I thought I was wasting their time but i was quite proud that I found a good example on importance of punctuation:

A panda walks into a café, sits down, and orders a sandwich. He eats the sandwich, draws a gun, and shoots the waiter. As the panda stands up and heads towards the exit, the manager shouts, "Hey! Where are you going? You just shot my waiter, and you didn't even pay for your sandwich!"

The panda produces a badly punctuated wildlife manual and tosses it over his shoulder. "Hey, man, I'm a PANDA!" the panda shouts back. "Look it up!"

The manager turns to the relevant entry and reads:

Panda: A tree-dwelling bear-like mammal of Asian origin, characterized by distinct black and white coloring. Eats, shoots and leaves.

Greatest Motivation- This came on the third day of my teaching when students from three different classes actually commented that I taught better than the previous teacher. Being inexperienced and untrained, this was definitely the greatest motivation and force that decide whether I take up the teaching scholarship.

During my three weeks stint, I had many opportunities to talk to the teachers there. In fact, I learnt that Dunman will be moving to the old RJC campus in end 2006 and the Tanjong Rhu campus will be torn down for rebuilding. More facilities will be required to cater for the Intergrated Programme (DHP), meaning there will be students taking the A levels. Well this explains the photo of 正心园 which I have taken, for remembrance sake. Ok the point is that the school may not have enough funds for the new campus, since MOE will not be paying 100% of the reconstruction costs, the school will need to raise funds and being an ex-student, I was conveniently handed a donation card. So now I hereby appeal to all ex-Dunmanians, kindly approach me if you are interested to make any donations. Of course, non-Dunmanians are welcome to donate too

And if there isn't a valid enough reason, here's another one. With the emergence of the various integrated programmes, eg from NJC, VJC and TJC, to put it simply, Dunman is facing a brain drain. Many of the outstanding secondary 2 students are choosing to leave Dunman, for the perceived greener pasteurs. Well of course, it's their choice to leave but quote 'we have nurtured and trained these students and now they are choosing to leave the sch'. This brain drain will have an adverse long term impact as the O levels results of the school will be affected, the worst case scenario being Dunman High becoming a sub-standard school with mediocre results. The donations from this drive will enable the sch to build better facilities and hopefully attract and retain students to compete with say the Raffles and Hwa Chong Family schools. I know that and many of you out that know that we are no way inferior to them, and to be the best that we can be (sounds so much like ACS school motto)

Well, you may think this whole education system is becoming so commercialised. Yes, indeed. We have schools advertising right outside the 158 and 30 bustop, inviting students to join the integrated programmes(IP). We even have Tv Mobile advertisements ,running for 1 min, advertising the IPs and on their open houses. One may wonder where all these schools actually get the money to run the advertisements. you mean they actually have budgets for marketing and publicity? Think of the opportunity costs when these schools pour hefty amounts on these ads. Shouldn't all these money be spent on developing better programmes and activities that benefit the students directly? They are in fact doing injustice to tax payers. Also, this money does not seem well spent since it does not go inline with the mission of the Education service which" Mould the future of the nation, by moulding the people who will determine the future of the nation"

View taken from ZhengXin Yuan 

A nEw Look!

A nEw Look!

Hey, I'm finally back with a new design. 5 week since i last updated any entry, to those loyal readers (as if i have), this wait is definitely worthwhile. I hereby promise that from now the entries will be more frequent since i am like unemployed after my stint at DHS and IE Singapore. I haven't enabled my comments though and also some alignment problems with my tag box. Somehow i need to look for another source of income, preferably those 1week/ 2 weeks asignments. Any jobs, anyone? Stay tuned for more updates!

Ernest's 21st Birthday..2H reunited 

I am a quitter

I Quit!

Went for small arms platoon dinner @ TAste of Thailand at Sembawang Shopping Centre. Was late along with Lionel and Selest. Dinner was Pineapple rice, prawns and a few bits of Kang Kung. Enough said, who asked you to be late in the first place? Haven't seen the guys for quite a while. The feeling was still great despite some unfamiliar faces, but there was just something missing, as though you do not really belong to this family anymore. Only managed to catch up with some of them, like Yuan Cheng to see how they are doing.

Three more days to D-day and I would say this day is being over-rated. Or is cos I have been clearing my leave for the past two mths? It was indeed a growing and maturing experience for me, by meeting people from all walks of life and also providing a glimpse of the working life that lies ahead of me. Perhaps I was one of the more fortunate ones, being highly myopic did not allow me to be fully deployable and my NS life turned out to be as though i was doing a 8-5 job. Throughout these 2+ yrs, I was constantly seeking some kind of motivation else I thought i will be a walking zombie in camp, just existing instead of living.

Back in JC. i yearned to know how to play a guitar and bought one without giving a second thought. After a few weeks of meddling with the strings, i lost interest and it ended up in the corner of my room, collecting dust.I quit. 3 yrs down the road, the guitar aint there anymore, I really wonder where it is now...? (hinting someone who borrowed to return, you knoe who you r)

I also have attempted network marketing, something which promised big bucks with hard work. True enough, I realised I did not have what it takes , and I guessed there were other issues which prevented me from continuing. I quit.

Seeking to find another source of motivation in my life, ACCA was next. I thought having a background in accounting will give me an edge over the others and I signed up for it. Without attempting even one paper, I quit, giving excuses to myself that accounting aint for me and that I did not have time to prepare for the paper. I quit.

Asked to become Unit Anniversary's secretary and i thought to myself why not since it's gonna be my last assignment. Yes, I guess i did not stick to it in the end, I could have,but somehow there was this miscommunication/ lack of communication betw the vice-chair and me and of course they have this more capable secretary helping him. I thought to myself "the Earth will not stop spinning without u anyway"

The most present one must be GTS 05( Global Trader Summit)on the 26th and 27th May. Somehow I was supposed to coordinate the registrations for this event but this relief teaching offer came and i grabbed it. In their eyes, I am just a temp staff and the new things I can learn from this job are diminishing. I quit once again.

Perhaps this is a character flaw of mine or perhaps it's just external factors that somehow influence me to quit these several occasion occasions. Anyone care to enlighten?

Good News!

GoOd nEws!

Time has elapsed and I am back with this entry. So many significant events have occurred during this period of time. I am aware that there are people out there who are concerned or 'kaypoh' with wat's happening to my life, or visit this site once in a while for bed-time reading, sorry to disappoint sometimes cos this is not going to be written to satifsy public wants.

Yesterday was quite a day for me. After half a day of work, went to K box with Chio, Boy, Ming feng and Jiwei. Quite an enjoyable karaoke session i say then off to Toa Payoh Safra where we had a game of tennis. Last time i played tennis was like back in VJ, so took some time to actually be able to hit *proper strokes. (* proper as in they dun fly up high and over the fence?) Next was a meal at LJS when boy chio and I were reminiscing about the times we played in chuida. Then came the thought of performing again in the ensemble,so how about a chuida concert? We'll gather all interested personnel, practise and we can relive the days performing on stage. Yeah, then came all the admin problems that we'll prob face to organise a concert like that: venue, instruments and shicheng which I should not attempt to elaborate here.Standing in Mr TTK's shoes, it'll defintely be a disappointment to see a group of us wanting to play for Dunman and not shicheng. I suppose more details will be out later when our nominated ( by three of us) chairman comes back from HK... Ha Ha!
Next was watching the movie "The Pacifier" which I think Vin Diesel did a good job playing the role of the nanny with the Plummers.

Good News! Ms Ling called again and offered me to relief teaching at Dunman for three weeks b4 June holidays which I gladly accepted. Relief teaching, besides paying well, gives me a golden opportunity to experience teaching in front of a class. Of course, I don't deny that there is this inherent fear that my legs will just go soft or I will go dumb in front of a class but this is a chance i will not let it slip by. By the way, I am supposed to teach Sec 3 Geography, a subject which I did not do at A levels. I am glad that she trust me with the job and I sincerely hope that I can live up to her standards and expectations.

Good News to share with everyone:
1) I am planning to go to Taiwan in July this year hosted by Andrew. $300 on air tix and accomodation provided for! What more can i expect? Just hoping that some of us can change our minds to go there instead of staying in Singapore.
2) My understudy Seb got into NUS! yeAh he called just now and he was so glad. It is really hard for a dip holder in Sing to make it into local U. They always are so biased towards JC students.
3) I will get my last NS pay today, meaning my ORD date is in sight and that also means a lost of income (OMG!)
4) I went to the canon training course last week and finally got more proficient in using my powershot A95.K, i know I am not good with this kind of thing...
5) Got a new tuition kid who happens to be WO Lui's son. Expectations are high so I better make sure he performs.
6) A new blog design is supposed to be up so stay tuned. ( I have this habit of promising things so that I will get my hands started to do it)

A major Revamp

a mAjOr rEvAmP?

Yes! I know this page needs a revamp. Goodness gracious, my wish list and my countdown timer are still around...These days, cant be bothered to do many things ,my room and table are still in a mess! By saying that this page needs a revamp, guess i will have no choice but to spend some time here.

I havent have the time to explore my camera too. I mean the canon powershot A95 has so many functions and being the not so IT-savy person, I am like wasting this $600 camera. Going for the free Canon camera training this coming Sat,hope after that, I'll be able to put it into good use.

In the mean time, hope to see a new template for my site soon...

wHo mOveD mY cHeEsE?

wHo mOveD mY cHeEsE?

Newton's law of inertia states that " The larger the mass of the object, the larger the reluctance for the object to change its state of motion or rest." I guess this applies to me too. Dr Spencer Johnson's "Who Moved My Cheese" was awakening call for me when I read it like 4 years ago. I've been living in my comfort zone for too long that i no longer have to courage to venture out into the unknown. My resistance to changes has cost me dearly.

I always thought I ought to make a magic marble for myself- a claymarble that is. A marble that I seek comfort in. It did not dawn on me that the magic is only in the making of the marble and when you throw the claymarble into a pond, there will just be a tiny splash, a few ripples and it's gone...

Setting Goals in my life

sImPle tAsKs

It's more than 1 week after my birthday and of course i cant live in that moment forever. For those who know,I will be rather busy the coming 2 mths till end of May. Will also be looking forward to the Taiwan Trip in July. He has promised to host us, hope that I have enough spare cash to enjoy myself then b4 school term starts.

Certain things that I need to do in this span of 2 weeks (starting from the easiest)
1) Send the warranty card for my new camera and handphone(It's long overdue)
2) Settle both my dental and medical FFI on 14/3/05( cos I cant spare another day to go down camp)
3) Help vin get his Mizuno shoes from E-mart, in the same time use up the emart credits
4) Stop being a bugger and clear up your camp locker for the convenience of others.
5) COnfirm attendance for my fren's birthday party on 19/3 for my classmates. His Gf has been bugging me and I am supposed to coordinate it.
6) Take a decent photo of myself and send the OAM forms to NUS for matriculation purposes.
7) Try to salvage a friendship. Honestly I do not know where to start, just that I have stopped being a celestial being? OK, that's not the point.

6 Simple tasks and I am not gettng off my butt to do anything yet. The 7th one is a bit hard though. It takes more than 1 hand to clap

More Pics of the birthday party 

My family: Pa, Mi, Jie and Me 

Being 21

bEiNg 21

Gosh, I seem to have some problems posting more than one picture on this blog, am using Hello now, not sure whether that is the cause of the problem. Till this problem is solved, guess I cant really publish more than 1 pic online. Am using Hello cos am too impatient to upload pictures onto an online server.

The Chalet was great! Hope all of you who attended it had fun. Now, I will like to take this opportunity to show my most sincere gratitude to all who made this chalet possible ( meaning all who attended) and of course for the generous Ang Pows and presents I have received. Many many thanks to

1) Ma who sponsored the chalet and food which amounted to around $800 (she demanded a share of the Ang Pows after that)
2) Pa who fried the chicken wings and squids( for fear that there wasn;t enough food for like 60plus pple)
3) Jie and Benson who got me the Canon Powershot A95( It's ex but you will also get to use it ma)
4) all my relatives and others who gave Ang Pows( you helped my Mum recoup some of the costs)
5) Vijay (the food IC not the present IC...What happened to my present IC?) who coordinated about 30 plus people from camp to share for my Nokia 6260( Loved that phone, Samsung Sucks, still exploring the functions)
6) Sebastian yang( my understudy) who got me a Jay Chou 无与伦比 live VCD (though I got the live CD le)
7) Peiyi, Yuwei, Joel, Desmond, Mel C, Zhiren for getting the crumpler Laptop bAg( though I haven't gotten my laptop yet, sorry for burning a hole in your pocket)
8) 01S48( Stef, Eng Meng, Kenvia, Lex, Kevin, Jason, Chun Li, Jac) Thanks for the Crumpler vouchers, the camera bag for my A95 and the 2 watermelons( Yup I realised the significance of the fruits after my hangover)
9) Tsz Shan for the fossil watch and bible( Promise I will go read it..)
10) Sebastian, Ivan and Haojie for the Levis T-shirt and book( Been long since we met up, great to be still in contact)
11) Yanhan for coming (though the gang of Adel, HuiShi(thank for the message) and Cheryl aint in SG plus u got test the next day, nice shirt too!)
12) Yubin ( my cousin) for the Davidoff fragrance
13) Vin, Na, Gene, Ming for sponsoring the alcohol (though it is atill not enough, special mention to Gene who brought Gin which my camp mates finished the next day)
14) Andrew for calling from Australia on that night( Sorry dint get to talk long cos I had to entertain people)
15) SSG Koh, MSG Lee, Cpt Darren and CPt DOn to come despite their bust scehdules
16) Debbie who gave me my first present when she came back from Hk some time back
17) Senny who offered to fry some bee hoon when i told her I may not have enough food
18) Tammy, June and XiuHua Jie( Ma's ex colleagues) for sponsoring the 3Kg MAngo Cake from JAck's Place)
19) Quincy for bringing the Absolute Mandarin on the 2nd night which was emptied coincidenatlly by my camp mates on the 2nd night
20) Colin for taking his video cam down ( I haven seen what you have filmed)
21) Neil for the shirt( U came though u have exams the next day!!
22) Miaorong for the small cute thing( Sorry if i only invited u last min, we've known each other for 16 years)
23) Grace for attending the party( Did you have a share in the bible? OOps)
24) Alex for offering his friend's membership card for me to rent the place at a lower price
25) Weiqi for being my first guest at the chalet who gave me a Parker pen
Such a long list, I had better not left out anyone here, sorry to all those who felt left out cos I really had not much time with all the pple there. I was a bit high on alcohol(or izzit drunk), was speaking louder than normal that night. It was the first time I puked after drinking that night too.

The intial hassle of organising the chalet, was definitely worth it as that was the day that all my relatives and friends from different stages of life all come together to celebrate the occasion. Friends that have accompanied me through my darkest moments and my brightest days. Thank you for being there all these while.

Being 21 marks the first step into adulthood, marks the end of my army life and into University life. Yup, it's just another day on the calendar you may think, having a chalet may seem so commercialised, well I guess it still made this day one of the most memorable in my life! Your presence definitely made a difference!

pRePaRaTiOnS fOr tHe bIg dAy

pRePaRaTiOnS fOr tHe bIg dAy

Some of you may have already known, I was comtemplating between going overseas for a holiday or organising a party for my twenty-first birthday. Hong Kong or Taiwan was my preferred destinations, sadly, there weren't people available for a getaway in the first week of March. Moreover, I only informed them like one week b4, hence I settled with the idea of having a chalet.

Location wise, I was quite keen on booking Aranda COuntry Club for being spacious and its location. I wanted my guests to enjoy themselves and feel comfortable. The only drawback was the pricing of the chalet, it definitely ain't cheap for booking a suite on weekends where supposedly most people will be able to attend.
Secondly, it was the guest list, this party was for my close friends and acquaintances from different stages from my life to attend. Family and relatives cannot be neglected. Out came a guest list of almost 70 people. Oh my Gosh!
I did a lot of research on catering and buffet menus, spending almost one whole day calling these caterers, asking them to e mail me their menus and details, only to come across this small line on the Aranda web site" No outside caterers are allowed". That leaves me no choice but to cater for 50 people at a whooping $12 per head!

Friends like Senny, Calvin, Sebastian, Gene, Nest offered to help at the chalet and Two of my closest camp mates volunteered their services (or did I assign them?) as Present IC to coordinate efforts to get a present and a food IC to source for food caterers. Three of my mum's ex colleagues also offered to sponsor the cake. Everything seemed to be in full steam in preparation for the big day...

My Twenty-first Birthday Cake, nice huh? 

rAy cHaRlEs

rAy cHaRLeS

Ray is the never-before-told, musical biographical drama of American legend Ray Charles. Featuring a remarkable performance from Jamie Foxx in the central role, Ray follows the inspiring story of a one-of-a-kind genius.

Born in a poor town in Georgia, Ray Charles went blind at the age of seven shortly after witnessing his younger brother's accidental death. Inspired by a fiercely independent mother who insisted he make his own way in the world, Charles found his calling and his gift behind a piano keyboard. Touring across the Southern musical circuit, the soulful singer gained a reputation and then exploded with worldwide fame when he pioneered incorporating gospel, country, jazz and orchestral influences into his inimitable style. As he revolutionized the way people appreciated music, he simultaneously fought segregation in the very clubs that launched him and championed artists' rights within the corporate music business. Ray provides an unflinching portrait of Charles' musical genius as he overcomes drug addiction while transforming into one of this country's most beloved performer. (Quote from Universal Pictures)

There is the blackness and the blindness. There was the extreme poverty; there was the segregated South into which he was born. I like films/ books whose themes revolve around racial discrimnation, for eg "To Kill A Mocking Bird", "Roll of Thunder, Hear my Cry etc. Ray Charles has an admirable character, besides being hooked on drugs during his later years which was the unglamourous part, he fought for the rights for the coloured in the state of Geogia by refusing to perform in front of a segregated audience.

Been a long time since I watched a really good movie. There is great music throughout the show as the audience are brought on the journey of the success of his remarkable career despite being him being coloured and blind in 1950 America. The director also captured the essence of the english spoken by the blacks whom always use double negatives in their speech. For eg" you aint not going to no white man's house". From my studies of E lit, this is quite typical of what coloured people at that period in the Southern States. Hence, I rate this film 8.5 out of a 10 and I recommend to all who have not watched this film.

Do visit the official site of Ray Charles

tHe sMeLL oF fReEdOm

tHe sMeLL oF fReEdOm

Indeed, this smell is more sanguine than one can imagine. The feeling is just like a caged dove being released, spreading and soaring its wings into the sky. It was not long when the dove realised that unlike in a cage, no one will feed it any food, it has to source for food itself, all on its own.

This leads to a new problem, i prolly need a job for this break till July. The situation aint that simple as you think. I am holding a Green IC/ not a pink one, meaning I cant get a government job or a job with CPF till the magical date on the right hand corner of your screen. So pple with any suitable job openings, pls inform me ya, and you shall be greatly rewarded...yeah right

Will be busy these few days to organise for my 21st birthday: Chalet needs to be booked, food to be catered, cake to be ordered, etc. Any sponsors for alcohol/beer on that day? Hm after serious consideration, i think i should update my birthday wishlist, and just in case i get the 2 Fossil watches or 2 new wallets, kindly inform me so that I can book the lot for you..harhar (BHB)

sUgArCaNe

sUgArCaNe

Today probably marks the last official day I will be in camp b4 i enter into my next phase of life. Thinking about it, I have been in the company for like 1yr 9 mths. I wont dare to say I contributed a lot to the coy, needless to say for SA platoon. Well at least that's what my PC and PWO thought too. Why should I deserve any ORD off in the first place?

I told many people in camp this" Every NSF is just like a passing cloud" Not many regulars/ officers will remember your contributions after 6 mths you ord just like the clock in the workshop today. Its battery was probably weak then i asked Sebastian " Who will rememeber what this clock looks like if a new clock replaced it after it had served the company for 3 years?" He nodded.

And here I am, in my last few days of my work " like a sugar cane that has been through the sugercane machine for so many times, squeezing the last bit of juice out of me" And I have to emphasise the last bit of juice in the sugercane juice probably wont taste as sweet as a freshly squeezed one.

Enough of ramblings and grumbles. Definitely gonna miss the dudes out there in the coy and other people like Neil, Angelo, Yaohui, Mark and Wee Cher. Thanks for being around, your day will come sooner than you expect.

Dint exactly know my status was upgraded to the status of a celestial being?Just wanna let all commoners out there know that being in the mortal world, one can only imagine the existence of heaven and celestial beings. These things probably only exist in the commoner's mind. Something that is just a facade, blurring his vision at all angles. These celestial beings did not consume any elixir of life nor they can do without their close friends. They are in fact just commoners themselves. Is there a need for the commoner to build a wall around himself, segregating himself from the so called 'celestial beings' when he can choose to demolish the wall and share the space with fellow commoners? I am sure all the commoners will be much happier...

cNy nOrM

cNy nOrM

Can't really recall the last CNY that there wasn't some sort of disagreement/ quarrel between my dad with the rest in the family. It never fails to spoil my mood for CNY, or perhaps I have just grown out of it.

AngPows, chinese near year goodies and reunion dinner. Chinese New Year is definitely a time for reunion. For myself, I have to take this opportunity to get-together with all my cousins. Due to our individual hectic schedules, few of us take the effort to go visit our grandparents. Being me again, I will recall the good old childhood days playing in the void deck with all of them.

雄：恭贺大家心想事成， 万事如意，在鸡年里做番冲刺，梦想成真！

倒带

倒带

我受过了等待 妳所谓的安排　
說的未来到底多久才来
总是要来不及 才知道我可爱
我想依赖而你却都不在

应该開心的地带 妳给的全是空白
一个人假日發呆 找不到人陪我看海　
我在幸福的門外 却一直都進不来
你累積給的伤害 我是真的很難释怀

終於看開 爱回不来 而你总是太晚明白　
最後才把话說開 哭著求我留下来
終於看開 爱回不来 我们面前太多阻礙　
你的手却放不開　宁愿没出息 求我别離開　

你总是要我乖 慢慢计划将来
我的眼泪却一直掉下来
過去怎麼交代 你该給的信赖　
被你親手缓缓推入悬崖

从我脸上的蒼白 看到记忆慢下来
過去甜蜜在倒带 只是感覺已经不在　
而我对你的期待 被你一次次摔坏
已经碎成太多块 要怎麼拼凑跟重来

作詞：方文山　作曲：周杰伦

雄：只觉得这首歌很好听，歌词并没有代表之自己的内心情感

Reminiscence

rEmInIsCeNcE

It was a great feeling as i stepped into the premises of the school along Tanjong Rhu Road. The drinks stall auntie recognised me immediately as i drank the longan drink in the canteen. Everything still looked very familiar, the green tables and benches, students clad in white tops with metal buttons, the girls with their long blue skirts covering up to their knee caps...

Saw Ms Ling at the foyer, she was my Peer Support teacher-in-charge and she called me recently to relief teach at DHS, too bad I was still in service. Senny came shortly after and Ms Ling brought us into the staff room where we saw: Ms Tang/ MS Pear/ Mrs Shu/ Mr Lian/ Mrs George/ Mrs Vora/ Mrs Ho/Ms Yee/ Mrs Grace Bok/ ¬family of teachers. Heh, trying to list all whom i saw.

Whilst Senny was talking to 连汉川老师 ，i went to look for Mr kiw, yes! The discipline master who made Dunman famous for the some of the strictest school rules we have (For eg, school bags and straps of watches cannot only be of blue, black, grey or metallic/ length of skirts for girls need to cover the kneecaps). I spoke to him as he walked to his class for lessons. On our way, you can really see some of the students try ways and means not to cross our paths. For those who do, they never fail to greet him as they bow(鞠躬). Well, i haven realy seen people who are that courteous or respectful in a long long time.

I went to 上音 today! (It's a CO school for those who may not know). Wilford wanted to learn the 二胡 so we arranged to go down today. Unfortunately 丁老师 was not around so we dint stay there for long, was just talking to 王老师 about my life in NS. She came up with a conclusion though with her signature 高调 voice '男生嘛，都应该去服役，看看伟雄变得高大俊俏多了！' Oops, the usual Buay2 hiao2 bai4 me...

Not much thoughts, just like to pen down what i did today. A riddle to all Dunmanians 猜一位德明老师：长江黄河一同流。Answers anyone?

Life Choices

lIfE cHoIcEs

Was reflecting back on certain decisions which i made in life, these are choices which I made they have definitely have a certain impact on my life and have the shaped the "Xiong" you know. What if

1) I made the decision to go to RI instead of DHS. I believe the secondary school u go to is like a scupltor who eventually shapes the whole character of a person. Of course, it was my parent's will for me to go DHS since young and since it's nearer to where i stayed, DHS was the natural choice. Being a traditional chinese medium school, with its strong emphasis on chinese literature and culture

2) Most of you may not know this, during the ECA sports selection, i was handpicked to join basketball. Had some tyco shots during the trials and they shortlisted m name to join. I only went for one training...

3) i took up japanese as a third lang in Secondary one. Too lazy to travel to Bishan after school hours, only to realise i have to travel from Bukit Panjang to Tanjong Rhu from sec 2 onwards.

4) did not choose Geo and E lit which i dint regret though I thought i was the C Lit kind. My Chinese standard has been stagnant since then.

5) Gone to NJ instead of VJ?

6) i choose to be a techinican and not the coy clerk. Will my repairing skills be superb?

7) Choose to be COPA when the opportunity came

8) Choose to go to S1 branch when she approach me. (For 7,8 I felt that bring born and bred in armament, I cant leave the company for possibly greener pasteurs?)

9) I choose to wait for Vijay and not board the bus alone this morning?

Well, no point brooding over the past, since these decisions have already been made. Sometimes I feel that I always like to live in the past. Just some food for thought i guess. SO now, time for me to look at the things i need to do for now till March:

1) Send out my letters of recommendation and cover letters for relief teaching to schools near my house.
2) Settle Unit anniversary stuff
3) Enjoy Chinese New year, get some hong Baos/ win some money
4) Do my unit clearance
5) Spend time in camp
5) Plan for my 21st birthday party
6) Find a part time job which pays well

Inferiority Complex

iNfeRiOrItY cOmPleX

I think I am developing the above syndrome. it's probably due to certain events that have occurred to me these few days. Dun think I will care to elaborate much.
1) Quote "This kind of creative thing, Xiong cannot do one" Once again, guess have to re-emphasise that a company clerk, you only get tasks like "typing a document, interpretation of data etc" I was never tasked to take up higher-order tasks, which probably require more brain juices, these are reserved for those who are perceived to be more creative and flexible, maybe I am indeed less capable
2) OC wanted to appoint him as vice-chair, I am not jealous or envious; deep down inside I was just doubting my capabilities. Maybe I am indeed inferior.
3) WO Lui gave me an hourly rate of $2.60 to work in the workshop while there are people's hourly wage can be up to $8. Maybe I am indeed useless in the workshop.
4) Quote " Xiong drives like a girl". probably too defensive. Had a rather close shave in Yuwei's carpark, the car was like super close to the van. Maybe I indeed do not have the judgement for parking or driving.
5) Quote" IPPT keeps you fit, anyway u are unfit". I try to really put in my effort during life- runs, there aint much improvement. Probably no faster than when I was in DHS or VJC. Cant seem to coordinate my breathing along with my running pace, maybe I am indeed unfit.

I remembered I told myself in secondary one that I do not want to compete with people around me in terms of studies, sports or whatsoever. I just could not take it when there are people kept asking how much i got for this examination or test. I wanted to compete with myself and thus i set goals for myself to achieve. Seven years down the road, I realised I set goals quite easily attainable for myself. 12mins flat for my 2.4 timing and I am probably satisfied. I am not pushing myself to the limits. Been living in this comfort zone for too long, I begin to lose sight of my peers. I am oblivious to the surroundings, my peers are surging forward in this race, leaving me far far behind, living in my own world.

tHe afTeRmaTh

tHe aftErMaTh

I need to find a source of motivation for myself, half a year ago, it was to get a license. Until now, i have not found myself one yet. I am hoping to indulge myself in some work, some real work after I stepped down. Been helping around in the workshop but its not something which i realli can derive satifaction from. Luckily, Shiyao got me to be involved in the planning of the unit anniversary, hopefully this will keep me occupied till i start clearing my leave.

I realised I can be quie mean when i don't like someone. To quote Andrew:‘恨一个人是很辛苦的’. I am glad I am not prejudiced against him anymore. I was being unsympathetic and insensitive, prob even going to the extent of bad-mouthing the person. Though he still gets on my nerves at times, I shall no longer be that 小器雄 that I am sometimes being labelled as.

My finances aint in good shape.. I do not know where I spent my money every month. My mum accused me of not saving any money during my NS days, but she is only partially right. I am putting aside $100 for my AIA insurance/ investment plan since 2003, just that these money is not liquid, hopefully its earning a hefty interest for me. People, pls stop me if u think I am splurging on things i shant spend money on. You can help too, by clicking on the google ads on the right. So far, I have earned US$7.96...

Question of the day:
1) How many 21st birthday parties do you think you will attend this year?

First Entry "Reloaded"

mY fIrSt eNtry 'Reloaded'

The content of this entry should be in my first entry, glad that I can finally pen this down. 'I passed my driving test!!!' though with 14 points, yup i still passed. Luck was probably on my side, was still having the jitters during warm up. Really heaved a sigh of relief. Wanna thank all for the good luck messages from Steph, Jon, Vijay, my sis, Wilford, msg tan... I dint waste the luck. Well i must say, this must be one of the happiest event that happened in my life since i enlisted ya!

What's with the ads? Guys, a few of you have asked about the ads on my blog. Well, they are Google AdSense ads, and, peiyi was the one who recommended me to sign up. Basically, all you have to do is create an account with Google, then put the code onto your blog that serves the ads. Then, when your visitors click on one of the ads, you get paid. It's really that simple. So, that's what the ads are all about. No big deal ... they don't make the page take any longer to download and they don't distract from my blog. Let me know if they get on your nerves. People have asked me whether this is a hoax or for real, hm i wont know until i get paid, so in the mean time probably u guys out there can try clicking on the ads ya?

The Race

Competitive Streak

I never thought that I had the competitive streak in me. I was not upset nor jealous when I knew about the truth on Thursday. I literally felt the immense pressure that was on me. I wanted to find some corner of the room and be in solitude...I went home. I thought I hid my emotions well...I always thought I did, till Lionel sent me this message "Xiong seems quite upset after knowing the truth". I really pray to have the same result on Monday.

Happie New Year 2005

Happy New Year 2005

Finally it's my year,the year that I become Operationally Ready. You may be wondering wat I am doing at home at this time on 31st December. I am not in Zouk, Sentosa, Orchard Road or Esplanade. No fireworks, just alone in front of this small monitor, in a 5-Rm HDB flat. Counting Down? I seemed to have grown out of it, dun think I see the point of standing with a big crowd, counting down the last 20 seconds before the start of a brand new year. Such precious moments should be spent with your dear ones, or at least alone reflecting on the previous year and make some resolutions for the coming year.

2004 had had its ups and downs, I lost my dearest aunt back in January. It had been a long time since I had shed my tears. Her departure was so sudden. The feeling was immense like a piece of flesh cut out from your body and the pain was indeed excruciating. Her image remains forever etched in my mind.

The offer of a teaching scholarship came in March and I accepted it. Partly due to interest to teach and influence people's lives and to lighten the financial burden for my Mum who got retrenched earlier in March. Close friends who knoe me well were concerned with my decision, the desire to teach was never strong in me but they never knew it became stronger when i see my tuition kid do well. This decision may probably affect my entire life and deep down inside in the bottom of my heart, i pray that i wont regret this.

I've finally stepped down as the company clerk in September after one year of service.It was an enriching experience, working with demanding superiors, unreasonable and incompetent people and orientating the new guys. Guess nothing wears me out as much as the constant need of putting on different masks when facing different people. Yes, I am a hypocrite and I don't deny it. Aren't You?

The one person I have let down most this year is probably her. It is a queer relationship that we are having now. There are things which seemed to be unsettled and I being a bastard (Vijay calls me this) am not doing much either. Don't think on the wrong tracks, it's not some drama serial that the guy got some girl pregnant or watsoever. I have to admit that I am selfish and that I need a lot of breathing space for myself. It aint easy to be the special someone in my life. The problem is with me, really.

I remembered noe of my new year resolutions for 2004 was to pass my driving but sadly i failed to accomplish that. Oh ya, my driving test is coming and stay tuned for the latest updates. 2005 got to be an exciting year ahead and I will be going back to my studying days. I am sure i need some oiling for my rusty brains. On a lighter note, here are some of my humble new year resolutions:

1) Pass my driving test!
2) Learn some photoshop, dreamweaver, HTML, flash and the list goes on
3) Enjoy my remaining mths in camp, 2 mths to be exact, with close dudes in camp
4) Get a relief teaching post at my alma mater or any other schools available
5) Be less hypocritcal?
6) A better person?


Quotes of the day:
1) "People around you are suffering because of the tsunami and you are talking about what you want for 21st birthday?"
2) "Mother Nature is punishing mankind for all the damage we had done to her, it's something called retribution"